Tuesday, June 21, 2011

that's me, a screw up

Its not too often that I get things right.

I am more of your try it, screw it up, leave it for a while, think about it, think about going back to it, touch it again, screw it up again, consult the internet and eventually get it done type of guy.

You know the type. You see him at Home Depot like 5 times on a Saturday picking up various tools and materials, often re-buying the same thing over and over again because he screwed up a measurement and cut the 2x4 3 inches too short. 

He starts out early in the morning all smiles, but when you see him again 5 minutes before closing, he is sweaty, looks tired, and is clearly, well, pissed off.

That's me, a screw up.

So I was hanging out with a friend of mine the other day. Now this guy is a bit younger than I am, like almost young enough to be my kid, but he is a friend. We hang out, we talk, we share life. Anyway, as we are driving he tells me that he thinks of me like a father.

At first I was a little offended. I mean, seriously, he is a friend and I treat him like a friend, not like a kid, but like a friend. I even told him that I don't want to be his substitute dad, just his friend. To be honest, I think I came across as an a-hole. I wasn't thinking about him or anything else I just felt old!

My buddy was calling me old!

So we keep on driving and I start thinking about the situation and what a douche I am. We are friends and I know he would never do anything to hurt me or my feelings. He treats me, and my family, as his own. And to top it off, this is a guy who doesn't have a really good relationship with his dad and, for whatever reason, he has found some of what he is missing in our relationship, and I just basically told him I don't want any part of it.

We are over it now. He has since told me the same thing again and I have just kept my mouth shut, a bit humbled by my idiocy and completely honored by the opportunity to be a “father” to someone else.


So how have you run your mouth and hurt those around you?  Who are you connecting with and how?  What does it mean to be a father to the fatherless?
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